Welcome to One Minute Theater.
Spectacular drama to help you goof off... er... get you through your busy day!
Outside the Police Interrogation Room
Two officers stand in front of the one way glass discussing the person sitting alone inside the room. The suspect is a mime.
Cop #1: So? Who is this clown?
Cop #2: I believe he is a mime!
Cop #1: A what?
Cop #2: A mime.
Cop #1: Did you get anything out of him?
Cop #2: Not a word.
Cop #1: Really? So what’s his story?
Cop #2: Well! He seems to have been confined in a box at some point.
Cop #1: And he told you this?
Cop #2: Again, not a word. But it must have been some place that was windy.
Cop #1: So! He told you that?
Cop #2: As I said... he hasn’t uttered one word!
Cop #1: I don’t follow. Where are you getting all the details about the box and weather?
Cop #2: He described them to me.
Cop #1: Oh! It was then he stopped talking...?
Cop #2: He's never once uttered a word.
Cop #1: I don’t follow. Hmmm! What's with the clown make-up?
Cop #2: I believe the white face paint is used to help exaggerate his facial expressions.
Cop #1: So! He’s not a Caucasian, then?
Cop #2: He appears to be.
Cop #1: I don’t follow.
Cop #2: He’s what they call a 'street performer'.
Cop #1: He sells to kids on the street?
Cop #2: What? No! He doesn’t sell anything, but he does take donations.
Cop #1: Ahhh! A bunko artist!
Cop #2: I believe he’s more a performance artist.
Cop #1: Ahhh! Performing some community service?
Cop #2: Er.. no... while he does perform for the community... er.. people... I don’t believe it's a service.
Cop #1: What’s he charged with?
Cop #2: Intimidation. Accosting a spectator. It started out with some imaginary rope trick. He just kept pulling at it... and pulling... pulling...
Cop #1: So! It was a tied up spectator who called out for police assistance?
Cop #2: No! But after the rope routine... he came over to the crowd... snatched and grabbed a police officer’s hat, put it on his head and started to comically mimic the officer in front of the crowd... making large, menacing gestures. It provoked laughter from the spectators. A lot of laughter... at the officer's expense.
Cop #1: So... that is when a spectator in the crowd got hurt?
Cop #2: Yes.... well... no spectator. It was... Me! He hurt my feelings. Look! Ridiculing an authority figure by insulting his position of authority is the first step toward civil disobedience, I’ll have you know...
(The mime gets up from his chair and walks over to the one way glass. He pretends to clean the glass a bit then looks out and starts acting like he is rubbing his eyes and starting to cry.)
Cop #2: (Quietly, while tapping on the glass with his finger) You... are... a dead mime!
(The mime staggers as if suffering a heart attack.. then collapses... while pulling a plastic flower out of his sleeve which he holds against his chest... finally lying 'dead' on the Interrogation Room's floor.)
Cop #1: (Laughs) What a clown!
Cop #2: Mime!... A ^#%#& Mime!
~ Finis
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